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:
Bringingupchildren.
Ididn'tlearnpsychologyatschool,Ilearntitthehardway,
throughlifeexperienceswhilebringingupmydaughters.
Everychildhashisownpersonality.
Whenmyfirstborndaughterwasyoungshewasvery
kind,verygentle..WasitbecauseIoverprotectedher?
couldbe.Shenevercomplainedorresistedbeing
protected...
Shewassogentleandkindthatherpre-schoolteachers
alsoprotectedherofotherkids'aggression.Lookingback
itseemstomethateveryadultwhoknewhertendedto
overprotecther.Shetrustedadultsandwasvery
gentle/carefulwithherstepsanddoings.
Myseconddaughter,ontheotherhand,hasdifferent
personality.Shewasoutgoingandveryadventurous.I
triedtoprotecthertoobutsheregardedmyprotectionas
limitingherstepsandresistedmyprotection,soIhadto
thinktwicebeforeaskingforherhandwhencrossingthe
street.
Herpre-schoolteacherstoldmeshewasverykindto
otherkids,yet,shecoulddefendherselfverywelland
soon,aggressivekidslearntthattheywouldratherpickon
somebodyelse...
Asaparent,Irealizedthata"workingsolution"or"working
behavior"foronekidcouldbenotworkingatallfor
another.
Forexample,itwasworkingwellifIsaid"No"tomyfirst
borndaughterbecauseshetrustedme.
Saying"No"hardlyworkedwithmyseconddaughter,
somehowshewantedtoseewhatwouldhappenifshedid
thatdespite...
Regards,
OrnaHaber
ohaber@troikanetworks.com

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